Placebic Phrases

to soothe the mind of;

Weight Thoughts

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My weight has fluctuated more than Oprah’s has over the course of my entire life.

I was pleasantly rounded as a toddler, stick skinny as a child, plump as a teenager, and 50kg of pure average now, as a young adult.



14 vs 19 year old me, in the same tank.

I was overweight in the past, but never obese. There was always something that made me stop and pull back, stop, you can be as self-loving as you want, you can believe in the ‘only dogs like bones, real men go for curves’ bs but for your own sake, never ever go beyond this weight mark, this size, the way a certain number makes you feel on the inside.

I’m not saying that you have to hate yourself, and beat yourself up constantly to ensure that you keep your health and appearances in check. But working in a lady’s retail store that boasts a vast selection of sizes – it does make you think, with larger sizes being offered, why should I lose weight?

There was a customer that came in yesterday that was unimpressed with the size selection. “Back in the past, you guys only had until size 14, what size do you guys have up to now?” To which I replied, a 20. “A 20!” she then went on to say incredulously, her eyes widening.

“So is your brand promoting obesity or what?” 

Here’s the deets straight up: this lady isn’t skinny, by any means, nor is she a blimp, she was just between UK 12 – 14 of pure averageness, her body type and shape fit someone of her age. There was nothing outstanding about her appearance, so she wasn’t being a snob, nor bitchy when she said what she did. She was just curious, and frankly speaking, so was I.

I’m all for loving yourself, and loving the body that you are born with, but I am not for promoting laziness and self-indulgence. I fully understand that genetics do play a role, and that body size does not equate healthiness.

I just wished more people realized that, and stopped with all the ‘thigh gaps are beautiful!’, ‘collarbones are sexy!’, ‘girls with asses and butts > girls as flat as a chalkboard’, so on and so forth.

I’m not for emaciated skinny chicks, nor am I for chunky chubby chicks. ‘Average’ pretty much sums up my preferences – but average isn’t going to sell in the magazines, nor TV nor any other media, is it now?

Between the size 0 models and the plus sized models, I have no one to look and relate to, and that, well.

That pretty much sucks.


Author: Diana N. Din

22, female, Singaporean. There's so much more to know than just my ASL. Like how I find informercials interesting, animated children's films more heart wrenching than the saddest adult film you can think of, how the mind of an extroverted introvert works and well, my life in general is pretty interesting if written about in the right way. Unless you're not into getting to know someone on a deeper level, and an ASL is all you need, then - kthxbai.

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